it’s over. just one more day. this time tomorrow i’ll be in my boyfriend’s bed (or out drinking myself stupid. but most likely in bed, possibly asleep because damn am i exhausted.). i have one day left with my children. 15 three year olds and 15 of the most inspiring, interesting, sweet, and CAPABLE people i’ve ever met. i am going to miss them (though i won’t miss institute) a lot, i suspect, especially the ones who i thought about all day and dreamt about all night (not in a creepy way). i have loved and bonded with these kids in a way i never would have thought possible for me and i am so grateful for that. i would be lucky to have a pre-k class in baltimore even half as wonderful as this one. here’s hoping…
“I hadn’t understood how days could be both long and short at the same time: long to live through, maybe, but so drawn out that they ended up flowing into one another. They lost their names.”
—Albert Camus, The Stranger
i’m doing lots of reblogging today but this is seriously my life right now and something i’m struggling with so much. i hate living my days waiting for the weekend just so i have an extra couple of seconds to think.
“At the end, all that’s left of you are your possessions. Perhaps that’s why I’ve never been able to throw anything away. Perhaps that’s why I hoarded the world: with the hope that when I died, the sum total of my things would suggest a life larger than the one I lived.”—Nicole Krauss (The History of Love: A Novel)
killing time waiting for my roommate to teach me how to use the copy machine
Harry Potter Questionnaire
Harry Potter Questionnaire
Reblog with your own answers
Your house: Ravenclaw DUH! Your favoritecharacter from the trio: Harry Three other favorite characters: Hermione, Sirius, Hagrid Least favorite character: Voldemort, duh. Come on. Also Umbridge. Favorite book: Half Blood Prince or maybe Deathly Hallows, or maybe Goblet, depends on my mood. But used to be Prisoner of Azkaban. One favoritemoment: The trip to St. Mungo’s. How you were introduced to the series: My grandma gave it to my brother for Christmas I think and we read it together the year we moved to Maryland in our empty house by ourselves. What would your favorite lesson be?: Charms!!! DUH! Favorite professor: McGonagall, duh. Which hallow would you take?: Invisibility Cloak. Which character are you most like?: Probably Hermione since I’m basically the smartest/best, but also Harry sometimes since I like when he’s a dick and really I can identify with most of the strong female leads. Three spells you’d like to be able to perform: ACCIO duh I say it all the time to myself, apparation (why is this not invented yet), lumos. Would you have entered your name in the Goblet of Fire?: Yes probably definitely. Would you have played Quidditch?: No way. What form would your Patronus take?: I was just thinking about this… I don’t know… maybe some kind of wolf, or maybe a doe or a snake. What would be your profession in the wizarding world?: I would, duh, be a professor at Hogwarts.
only 12 days left of institute… 10 days of school, probably 7 or 8 instructional days, and one weekend… 12 days left in philly, 10 days left of waking up at 5 and going to bed at 10, 12 days left of sharing a room, bathroom, and mini refrigerator… but only 10 days left with my kids.
i love the kids… but i am so ready for this to be over.
what do you do when you’re teaching summer school in the inner city and one of your students is a senior and the only thing standing between him and his full ride basketball scholarship to one of america’s best state schools is your chemistry class? oh, and that is complicated by the fact that he
I am trying the best I can. Sometimes the best is enough and sometimes it isn’t. I can’t say, right now, whether the best I am giving right now is enough for the 15 three year olds I am giving it to, but I really am trying. Every day has such high highs and low lows, but I never stop loving my kids and being amazed at how much their little bodies and brains can accomplish. I have to constantly remind myself that these are toddlers I am talking to. If they are so tired they can’t hold their heads up straight, they’re not going to be able to learn patterns. They have needs that cannot possibly fit into the TFA framework because their age is a huge factor in their capacity for academic growth. I need to remember this so I can respect them in a way that they can understand and feel.
I need to not let my frustrations with the organization I work for or the structure of school in general interfere with my ability to connect with my students and be there for them. I talked to dad about it tonight and he reminded me that, more than these kids need to learn to pattern, they need to feel loved and appreciated so they can come to school for the rest of their lives feeling like they want to be there. TFA might disagree, but he is right. TFA might not have an end-of-summer assessment for whether or not my three year olds understand and love school, but it’s more important than anything that can go on a list of concrete objectives.
when you’re sitting in front of 15 3-year-olds and they’re looking to you for direction.
i survived my first day of teaching pre-k (3) today.
one of my 3-year-olds asked me to draw a “crescent” on the board for her.
every single one of my children (even the one defiant one) sat criss-cross-applesauce with a quiet hand in the air for me (even if i did have to bribe the defiant one with one of her berets that fell out of her hair).
only one kid threw up, only a couple cried, only one cried all day, no one had an accident, and all my kids know their shapes. and, tomorrow, they will all know how to sort. and after next week, they will know how to pattern. and in 4 weeks, they will all pass their end-of-summer assessment. and in 13 years, they’ll all be going to college.